Merry Stitch Child Christmas

"We wish you a JIIIIIIIINGLY JIIIIIINGLE!!!"
"Apis, shut yer gob now, we're makin' mischief an' all."

The cheerful cacophony filled the attic of the dilapidated mansion, and quite rightly, as it was the season of much jingly and festive frolics. Well, aside from the comatose lady in her glass casket and the shell of a gentleman who watched over her, but we'll deviate from this darkness and solemn situation and instead jump over to the happier and much more jolly side of this story.

Our beloved teapot pirate, Captain Ceylon, crouched on a wooden beam which ran along the roof, staring intently at the hatch leading down to the main house. She strained to hold the piece of ribbon in both her hands which dangled down over the beam and ended with a large red glass bauble, looking rather like a festive pendulum.

The tell-tale creak of the ancient wooden hatch alerted our eccentric captsin to the presence of her mortal enemy. Well, not the soap bar, which was her other enemy, but this particular foe was one scarlet witch named Scissor, who was evil personified. The scrape of her giant scissors along the wood caused Ceylon to snap into action, and she began swinging the ribbon back and forth.

As the bauble gathered momentum, she gritted her teeth and braced herself as the top of Scissor's head appeared in the attic hatch.
"Wait for it… wait for it…" she willed herself not to let go, the opportune moment was approaching, and a counter attack was certainly imminent.
As Scissor rose like some she-beast of the attic, red skirts swirling and blades swinging, Ceylon swung the ribbon as hard as possible and, with a grunt, flung it directly at Scissor's face.

"FIRE!!!" She yelled, as the bauble hurtled towards the blood-red banshee.

Suffice to say, the bauble would have hit its mark perfectly, but unfortunately, Scissor swung her twin blades in time and smashed the glass sphere before it hit her face. The shards of red glass flew everywhere, but the unblinking face remained frozen in her expression of hatred.

"Time for our backup plan, methinks..." Ceylon mused, apparently oblivious to the now rather angered Scissor approaching her hideout.
"NOW, APIS!!" with this command, her trainee pirate and all-round hyperactive rascal, Apis Mellifera, leapt from her position, one ankle tied to a length of tinsel in a makeshift bungee cord. She sailed through the air, giggling like a lunatic until she came to a rather abrupt stop in front of Scissor's face, grinning from ear to ear, while bells and feathers in her hair jangled and flipped over her cheeks.

"'Ello smelly." Not the most eloquent remark, but still proved enough to irritate Scissor, who swung her blades at Apis. Fortunately for our mad pirate child, she spun at the last minute, barely missing the scissors, but giving her a change to retaliate.
She spun her body back to face Scissor and in a rather childish but still sufficiently effective manner, slapped her cheeks with both hands, causing the eight-inch scarlet devil girl to stumble and roar in anger at this insulting manoeuvre.

Once again she swung her blades, seemingly in her death slice, aiming for Apis' ankles.


Snip. Crack. Scream. Laughter.